I had a plan to sleep in a giant fractured egg. Yes, you heard that right. So twice before I have hiked to a magical area on the side of Mt. Hood called Paradise Park. It is very well named I can tell you that. Full of meadows and creeks and wildflowers all under the watchful eye of the summit of Hood, it truly feels like paradise! There are a few challenging river crossings to get there and some big canyons to climb in and out of. It is also a minimum commitment of 16 miles….with trails going every which way. It is like a choose your own adventure for your feet. It is also a great place to find bear tracks and scat in the snow, see blazing red and orange bushes in the fall and incredible sunsets most anytime of the year.
On my first hike up there, I had learned from some passing hikers that there is a place with a giant fractured egg on the side of the mountain. They told me how to find it and after thinking they were nuts, I continued my hike. Turns out they were not nuts at all. There is this monstrous boulder about the size of a small house that is shaped exactly like an egg. It was clearly thrown out of Hood on some eruption eons ago and when it landed in the meadows on her flank it cracked in half. There is just enough space inside that crack to walk through the egg. Of course, I have walked through him several times and each time I have had the idea that it would be fun to spend the night inside. There is literally barely room for one sleeping bag and perhaps the dogs if we all cuddle close inside that egg! But seriously how often in life can you say you have slept inside a giant fractured egg??? So that was the plan. (Remember I like inhospitable!)
I hiked all the way up and down the canyons, across the rivers and through the woods. It was a warm September day so we were sweaty and hot by the time we got to that egg. My entire world was fractured though when I arrived and found a father and daughter had set up a tent right next to my egg hotel! I was crushed and defeated. It was far too close to set up my own camp right next to them when I had the entire side of the mountain to chose from. I worked hard to overcome my mind and the disappointment of not sleeping in that egg. Instead, I found a shelf overlooking the surrounding ridges and mountains in a field of flowers and set up the best alternate camp I could. I was laying on my sleeping bag when I took that picture of the girls watching sunset. I ask you, what could be better than watching my dogs enjoying sunset from a field of flowers on the flank of a mountain? I realized that had I set up camp inside the egg, I would have missed one of my favorite sunsets of the year. Never mind that it then rained on us and the wind whipped up blowing my things all over the place while we were laying there in the down sleeping bag without the egg’s protection; I was not going to let this change of plans get to me! See, maybe I did learn something on my other hikes!! I would enjoy every moment of the night to come and the sunrise hike out the next day. You have to be flexible and ready for the unexpected in life! Sometimes it is just not in the cards to sleep in an egg. Will I go back and try it again someday? You bet.
While we are talking about Mt. Hood though, let me tell you about one of my hardest river crossings of the year up on her flanks. This was all still part of my River Boot Camp. We were doing this long trek on the Timberline trail through a section I had always wanted to do. It was summertime, so it was a hot day and we were pretty exposed. I had never done this loop, even though it has some spectacular waterfalls along the way, because there is a very challenging river crossing to do to complete the loop. But I knew we could take it on by now. There were actually several rivers to cross, and each got harder as we went. One involved more leaping…right above a 60-foot waterfall, and I am sure you can imagine how I felt about that one!
The worst one though was a wild torrent of milky glacial melt that had to be at least 20-25 feet wide with an unknown depth. With glacial melt, the water becomes so milky that you can’t see through it to ascertain depth at all. It was very fast flowing, with rolling rapids everywhere. I wanted to pee my pants just looking at it. But I have learned to not stop and think too much when I get to a river crossing. If I think too much, or try to find the perfect place to cross, I start to freeze up and will chicken out…which causes defeat and death in my soul. So not acceptable! I have learned to just hike very forcefully up to the river and allow no more than 60 seconds to pick a spot and have go time. I have this terrible drill sergeant voice in my head that forces me to “GO…. GO NOW!!! So, I do.
I pack a lightweight pair of water shoes for this and then tie my boots to the top of my pack. If I think the depth is greater than waist deep, I move my camera and gun from my hip tactical belt and put them on the top of my pack as well. This does not help if I go down, I know, but I try for the best. When the water is deep like this one, I have to carry Nova across. The hilarious thing is that as soon as I pick her up, she starts to doggie paddle the air with all four feet the entire way across. This does not really help me in any way when I am already struggling to carry my own pack weight, plus the paddling dog in my arms, all while maintaining balance in a raging river and oh, did I mention I am still tied to a wolf while doing this?
On this particular crossing as soon as we hit the water, I exclaimed out loud that the water was so warm! It was like tepid bathwater and it shocked me as I was expecting it to be cold. In fact, I actually stopped and looked up river to see the water pouring out of a glacier above in a huge waterfall and I could not figure out how it felt so warm. But I continued the crossing with the water getting deeper with each step. When it hit my waist, the current started to really push me. Normally you are never supposed to do crossing like this alone and you are supposed to use trekking poles to balance in the current. Well, I could not use poles as I had to carry Nova in my arms who is about 35 pounds without her pack or clothing weight. I figured I was not alone as I had God and the dogs on my side. But when the current started to take Josie right off her feet and she floated past me from left to right in that river and I had to brace for when the slack would come out of the line tying her to me, I did briefly rethink the entire plan.
Once Josie’s weight was pulling against me along with the current, I felt myself start to go down. But then Josie was swimming with all her might back to me and she is actually a very good swimmer. As I started to go down, she was there and I accidentally pushed myself back up off her back to gain my feet again. This sadly dunked the Wolf under water, but she didn’t seem to mind and we all then made it across fighting a tough and sandy scramble up the opposite bank. After making it across, I told the girls we had to eat something to celebrate. We had been fasting all day waiting for this big crossing. So, they ate their lunches and I pulled out a juicy orange to eat. After that citrus treat, I wanted to wash my hands and face in the river. Mind you, the same river we had just crossed. I walked over to it and stuck my hands into the water. My hands instantly turned beat red and hurt so badly from the frigid temps of that water!! I couldn’t even bear to wash my face it was so cold. I just stared and stared at that water trying to figure out how that could be the same river we crossed not 10 to 15 minutes ago that felt like bath water. I finally had to decide that it must have been my adrenaline running that made me feel that way and I have now experienced the same thing on every truly difficult glacial melt crossing since then. It is surreal! But a blessing in disguise at least in the moment to not feel the cold!
Another difficult lesson I learned was on a similar river crossing on Mt. Adams that I think only truly crazy people would even attempt. I had moved all my gear to the top of my pack as usual in preparation, except one thing I forgot…..the key and key fob for my truck were zipped in my short’s pockets! We were in that over waist deep water a long time fighting to cross it and get back out. When I realized that the key fob was underwater that whole time I was so worried I wouldn't even be able to get back in my truck after our night hike out….but thankfully they were fine. Since then, I always check my pockets for keys before crossing rivers! That is a good life lesson for sure!
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